There was a post floating about on Twitter recently stating that it was desired that people understand that ‘suicidal or self-harming behaviours aren’t attention seeking and people don’t do them just to spite you’ (@caitlini2001). And whilst I agree with this statement to some degree there is also the fact that sometimes these behaviours are attention seeking… now, hear me out!
Frankly, I don’t know where or when it was decided that attention seeking is a negative or selfish behaviour but personally I can’t comprehend that idea. Instead, I think it should be questioned why someone needs to go to these lengths for attention? How alone or lacking in love and comfort must someone be to resort to this? How desperate may they be for help and support? That isn’t selfish or negative, instead, it is sad and is no different to any other coping technique!
Upon stating this belief of mine someone, I know reached out to me and explained that in order to be taken seriously by Mental Health teams and professionals they had to resort to carrying out self-harm and how horrendous is that? That is such a flaw in the system (however, that’s a post for another day!).
So what I want to say is that if someone is attention seeking please take a moment of compassion. Please try to figure out what is going on that is meaning they need to carry out these behaviours. Please try to give them the attention they need. Please do not shun them, judge them, or deem it strictly negative on their part – instead, please see it as a problem that so desperately needs a resolution!
I totally agree with you. On the surface, it’s hard to sympathize with people like that. But it’s so important to see what’s really going on underneath! Thanks for saying this!
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Great post, discussions on this definitely need to be had. I would definitely agree that our system is flawed.
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I love the idea of asking wHY someone feels the need to attention seek, and not penalizing them for it immediately.
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